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A guy walks into a bar.
I can’t follow him because I’m not allowed yet.

A woman walked into my bar
(i can work at one but cant partake)
And asked if the Bloody Marys were good— And I asked the bartender if they were (because i can work at one but cant partake) And he said that we don’t sell them.
The woman left
And the bartender told me that they taste like Spicy tomato juice.
He does not like Bloody Marys.

A guy walked into my bar A regular at the pool tables And he gave me a cookie Two different times.

I saw him again just yesterday But he didn’t give me a cookie.

Here is a fact:
If you walk into my bar
And decide to punch someone in the face, Ron the bouncer will have to escort you out.

Here is a fact:
You will be allowed to drink at my bar
If you are twenty-one;
Fakes do not work at my bar.
Ron and the other bouncers are too smart for that.

Pop quiz!
Does my bar sell Bloody Marys? A) Yes
B) No
This will be graded.

Here is a confession:
For the longest time I thought we did not sell Bloody Marys because of what the bartender told me but then I saw the drink menu when one of the servers was putting in an order to the bar for a table and it had Bloody Marys on there so now I am just confused.

The pop quiz correct answer: C) Who’s to say?

A guy walks into my bar Followed by another guy And another guy
And a girl

And two more girls
And another guy
And another girl
And it’s the Friday Saturday night rush And all the bartenders get busy.

Here is a fact: Beer tastes bad.

A guy was walking in my bar And he bumped into me
And I bumped into him
And he

Spilled his drink down the back of my dress

And a guy walked into a bar
(tee hee)
And I followed him with my eyes Into a place where I wasn’t allowed As I walked home from
My bar.

Valentine (they/them), author of Letters to Space, is a Black Harlem-based writer. In their writing they focus on personifying the abstract, questioning morality, and exploring what it means to be human.

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